A letter to My Best Friend
Hi,
I hope you’re doing well. It has been a long time since we had a heart to heart conversation. Haha, all of this seems so vague. I’ve never written you a letter so I feel bad about it but nevermind.
I have been listening to Memories-Maroon 5 on loop now.
Memories bring back Memories bring back YOU.
You’ve been upset with me lately because I have consistently failed to keep in touch with you despite your umpteen tireless efforts. I am sorry, I miss you. Truth is that I cant cope with myself lately. This is the reason why I can’t gather myself to respond to your texts or even answer your calls.
Suffocation and breathlessness often rule me. At times all I want is to sleep forever because it is the only way I can save myself from the pain. Talking about pain-the physical ones are way way better than the mental traumas, Bhai at least you can see the hurt, blood, and the scars, unlike the hurt which resides inside the mind. My mantra is to live one day at a time since I can’t seem to see myself alive any beyond a day. Because a day comprises of exhausting 24 hours. You know, I have lost my appetite too. Haha, writing all of this down makes me realize the fact that I am so sick actually. Wow, this is what it feels like to be a depressed person :)
Smiling is so underrated : ( :
It is a task for me to put down in words when you ask me how am I doing. Though I am very well aware of the fact that you are all ears, I do not want to burden you with my secrets. Trouble is what I am trying to save you from, because at times even hearing it all out from a tired soul can be overwhelmingly drenching. I love you and that doesn’t change which is why I refrain from telling you what’s on my mind.
Trust me I never fail to share the fun times I have each day, my accomplishments, the pizza party, baby videos (Kobe VS Rasbhari), picnics, family drama or even about the half-burnt cupcake I made. I love you more than anyone else. You have been there for me when the world turned a blind eye and a deaf ear to me. I remember all the times when I broke down while you had my back, all the times when I was struggling to live, all the times when I lost hope, all the times you hugged me tight, all the times when you stayed up late just to make sure I slept well. Blessed I am to have a gem of a person like you. I can’t be the same for you and I really realllyy regret it each day. I am trying my best to be a good friend not sure if I am even close to what you are but yes.
There is too much of “I ’’in this letter of mine to you. The irony is that it should have been the other way round. Selfish Aarya, like always haha. Lekin ab mai jab itni selfish ho hi gayi hun , I would want you to do me a favor dost. Bhai, please aajao Mujhe Ek jhappi dedo Mujhe Rona hai jee bhar ke mere dost ke gale mein.
Request hai, please. Ab Nahi Hota hai yaar.
Oye, I love you.
Awaiting your hug,
Aarya Bacchi
